Lisa King and I are members of the Forever Fierce group on Facebook, started by our common friend Catherine Grace O’Connell. She is one of our Kintsugi Ladies whose story I share in the blog. (You can read it here.) Lisa mentioned her growth after hardship in the group, and I was curious.
I interviewed Lisa over the phone. She shared with me some intimate emotions that she had gone through in the course of that time. I had experienced a few financial declines in my own life, and I knew very familiarly some of the feelings that go through the minds of those who experience financial losses.
I understand the angst, the “what ifs,” and the fear of necessary lifestyle changes. Frankly, what I remember most is the exhaustion. This exhaustion stems from worry and being so vigilant with every dollar spent. It is the sense of being so limited all the time. In my opinion, the worst is when you need money for medical bills, and you don’t have the resources. This idea that a person needs to think twice before seeking medical care is heartbreaking. Those are moments when a financial downturn makes life really impossible.
It is said that one of the biggest reasons for divorce is loss of financial means, as it brings so much daily stressors. Financial downturns bring stress from every angle. A mindset change is pivotal to survive. I learned from Lisa that most of it is really about the choices you make.
Lessons from Lisa King
- Choice of thoughts: One can change what they think, when they think, and they can control their thoughts and focus on positive ones. It is an exercise of the brain. It is similar to going to the gym and beginning weight training. You may start with 5lbs. and then move to 10lbs. and so on… Just like that, you can begin training and strengthening the brain to think positive thoughts. It is a choice.
- Choice of attitude: You can feel sorry for yourself or you can find ways to discover joy. You can choose to be bitter or you can choose to focus on the blessings that the situation brings to you. You can choose to focus on the loss or you can find the reasons to be grateful. It is a choice.
- Choice of vision: You can choose to view yourself as the center of the world or you can turn the focus from yourself and start observing the people around you: seeing their lives, their struggles, their attitudes and allowing them in your lives. By giving of yourself to them, learning from them, and emulating them, you can change your perspective. It is a choice.
When you focus on the choices you have, you remove the feeling of loss and of not having control and power over a situation. You put yourself back in the driving seat of your life. Life stops happening to you. You become the guiding force behind your life through deliberate choices that will empower you as opposed to take away your control and your say in the matter.
Lisa chose to see the person who caused her financial loss as someone who ultimately gave her the biggest gift of all. He returned to her the power of controlling her life, even during very hard times. This grew to become a lesson that she could apply in all the areas of her life.
Follow Lisa on Instagram where she shares so many health tips @thefulfilledpharmacist
Buy the book Tiny Little Changes
Happily Ever After Organization: https://www.happilyeverafterleague.org/about-us/
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